Friday, October 16, 2009

Superpowers

At some point we have all been required to answer the ubiquitous question "What's your superpower?" I usually roll my eyes and say something dumb like "being able to walk in my new cherry red hooker-heels." Most likely this is not the correct response as it doesn't accomplish the group ice-breaking goal. 

In reality superpowers make me a little uneasy. Not that I don't think they are super cool, but how do you know what someone's criteria is for unleashing their superpower on you? I mean it's great if the result is bringing you back to life, or saving you from a speeding train, but what if the superpower is putting a pox on you or shrinking your head?



A girlfriend and I recently had a conversation on this complicated subject. 


GF: Ah to have the power to telepathically stun someone without them knowing -- wouldn't that be great? Like my ex-husband or step-mother? Not kill them, but give them shingles or something. 
Me: Ewwww 
GF: Or bladder infections. That is the superpower I want to have when I am a superhero, when I run my own planet. 
Me: Will you use it indiscriminately or will you set up some criteria so when I visit I'm not suddenly stricken with shingles when I accidentally punch you in the mouth? 
GF: Oh, I would reserve my power for the good type of evil. 
Me: oh, very reassuring.
GF: Not like the twinkle of a nose or something. Someone would have to rack up some really bad karma points to qualify for my program. There would be a group review process....a very limited group.
ME: And that is why superpowers make me nervous.

4 comments:

tallulah said...

My superpower would be to have another person feel the exact pain I was having at that moment. (stomach ache, menstrual cramps etc.) Then people might be a tad more sympathetic don't you think?

Jodi said...

Now T, that's really interesting. I'm probably just about the LEAST sympathetic person on the face of the earth. But that power just might work...

Jodi said...

Damn, the more I think about it, I hope NO ONE but you gets that power, T. I'd be getting shot with that on a daily basis by my husband, probably my mom, definately my sisters, my friends, co-workers. Shit, I could go on and on...

Jodi said...

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh, love the new blog face!